Interested in bisexuality...
Question: I'm a 28 year-old woman with a friend who is bisexual. She talks a lot about having sex with women or threesomes with male-female couples. Her tales have excited me and made me fantasize about having sex with her or possibly a threesome with my husband. But I can't seem to raise the subject with her. I would like the first encounter to be just her and then, if all goes well, a threesome with my husband. How can I reveal my fantasies to her comfortably? Do my fantasies mean that I am bisexual or just interested in a new thrill?
Answer: It doesn't sound like it should be too difficult to reveal your fantasies to your friend. She gives you an opening whenever she mentions bi sex with women or threesomes. You might make your fantasies known directly by saying something like: "All your stories about sex with women have made me fantasize about having sex with you." Or you might broach the subject indirectly by asking a question: "Have you ever fantasized about sex with me?" Then let her answer be your guide.
It's reasonably likely that her openness about sharing her bi and threesome experiences with you signal a willingness to play with you. On the other hand, it's also possible that her stories are just that, fantasies that she enjoys imagining but doesn't want to play out in real life. You should ask yourself that question as well. You fantasize having sex with this friend, but do you really want to? Or do you simply enjoy the fantasy?
As for what your fantasies "mean," that's up to you to decide. Some people are truly bisexual, equally attracted to both sexes. But most bisexual folks gravitate one way or the other, to women with some interest in men or to men with some attraction to women. And some bisexual people are basically straight or gay/lesbian, but occasionally like to have some bi fun. Where you fit along the continuum is for you to decide. But it can be fun and personally enlightening to try the sexually new and different, as long as you feel safe and comfortable with the situation. We wish you the best of luck figuring out who you really are sexually.
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